Date Night Conversation
My husband I and went out on a date last night. This isn’t something new for us because we try to go out at least once a month. Now that we have a 13 year old daughter dating has become easier because we don’t need to look for someone to babysit our kids.
Yesterday I spent the day cleaning the boy’s room. We have 3 boys in one room and it can get messy! I took about 4 bags of trash out of their room. I put all the toys away in the place that they should go. Then I told them if they messed it up they would loose all their stuff. My 10 year old came up to me an hugged me and told me thank you for cleaning his room. (He actually has less stuff so really his brothers cause the mess.)
Anyway what does cleaning my boy’s room have to do with date night? Well when I have spent all day cleaning out a mess I don’t feel like fixing dinner. I went and placed a gift card I got for Christmas in front of my husband and said let’s go to dinner.
When my husband works from home he already knows what the my day has been like. So instead we sometimes come up with some random thoughts. My husband said that we were terrible leaving our kids and going on a date on family night. (Mondays in our church is set aside for our family to do things together.) I thought to myself for a moment and agreed but at the same time I knew that we had other fun things to do as a family this week.
So our conversation took a turn. We talked about how happy we were compared to our parents. (Long stories that do not need to be gotten into.) He said his parents didn’t have a lot of money to go on dates. I said mine were that way as well before I was born. (FYI it makes a difference when you come 16 years after your sister.) My parents didn’t have money when they first got together. So we thought for a moment about how blessed we were with him getting a great job at 19.
Was it the money that made a difference in our lives? No it wasn’t and we knew that. What mattered is that we loved to spend time with each other alone. To renew our love by spending time without the kids and loving to be around each other.
It was sad to think that even though each set of our parents may not have had money one time in their lives that they chose not to spend quality time with just each other. I told him even if they didn’t have money they could’ve just gone out in the yard alone and had a picnic. Something simple to just renew the love they had for each other.
We may fight in front of our kids at times but our kids can see the love we have for each other. They know that date time is time that makes us relax and renew our love. They see us hug and kiss in front of them. (Even if the 6 year old hates it lol.) We show our love for each other in front of them and we show them that we love them just as much.
The whole thing made me sad that we never saw our parents show affection towards one another. At the same time it made me happy to know that being on this date was showing our kids that we love each other. They get excited to know what we did on our date. Where did you eat? Did you go to a movie and what did you see? It helps our children see that love is what is needed in a relationship.
What do you talk about on your dates? What do you do to show love to your spouse? Do your children see these actions and know that you love each other?